change..
its yet another fall, new shows on TV, leaves everywhere, the crisp gold after-effects of the dying sun rays. Yup not much has changed since autumn became fall.
I moved in with a friend last evening, wrapped up my whole little world in cardboard boxes and a heart ache in some corner. After all not everyone wants to leave the cozy warmth of a secure present for an unknown future. As I picked up the last pieces from my apartment, I realised how much of my naive hope had been spent in that place, how much I had thought things would just fall into place and I could live life as per schedule. Good I had spent just the naive part of the hope that resides in me, because there is still a part of me that knows its good to be optimistic about things, just not fatalistic about it. And that I had to work harder to get where I want to go.
I met the old lady who lived below me and told her I'm moving out. She wished me good luck for my future, and I dont know why but I felt sad knowing that I would probably never meet her in my life again. Its when u know its really over that u tend to feel bad. Its because u know there is no hope. And then it started raining. Just the wind and the slight drizzle. I had spent a lot of rainy nights in this place, some with utter despair, some with the smile I always seem to have when it rains. So when it did rain that day, I didnt feel anything. I just wanted to get out of there. I dropped the keys and bid farewell.
Its good to have many ends, because U know u have one more right around the corner..:)
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3 Comments:
where did you move to? same town?
Life often makes us take a nomadic course. Every beginning also has an end. :)
hmmm.. rain and smile in the same sentence?! are you mad?
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