Thursday, May 22, 2008

the citadel of expectations...

the beginning...

hyderabad house has become standard fare these days....and with every spoon of biryani and every piece of Nan...the stories we talk about become more and more familiar to everyone around us....being right next to the stanford campus, you would imagine us to talk about things we would want all of mankind to move towards...the latest position paper on foreign policy, the latest technology for a facebook app.....but for every 10 geeks in the room the only thing i think the four of us ever talk about are non-issues in the eyes of others....issues more mortal and benign yet which tend to boil over because the solutions arent anywhere in sight....

now most ppl reading this blog ( if there are any left) would jump to conclusions ( or even hump to it)...but sorry boss, this place no longer resembles stories from real life. the only thing that ever gets written here are either as old as McCain or as irrelevant as him...( go obama! )

so what about the expectations or the lack of it?....its more like the rhyme we used to listen to when we were kids ...somethin to do with a mulberry bush ( whatever the hell that is)...and we all fall down....oh ya...here we go around the mulberry bush....and we all fall down....

honestly i dont remember anythin to be half as lame as that but then most things we do as kids are lame....parents have to call them cute...i prefer to call them retarded....

have u ever realized how parents get so riled up about their kids and how the most annoying kids in a restaurant are Desi kids?.....In the entire restaurant u would see 10 kids...8 american kids who mind their business....and 2 desi kids who mind everyones else's.....

thats why american kids are more prone to ADD i think...bcos desi kids are beyond all that by the time their parents grow up....if their parents are around i must mention....

coming back to the expectations gig....ppl always mention how we should manage expectations...whether its about work or life or anythin remotely connected to charles dickens...on how u dont raise the stakes before u know it can be achieved...but in an age where everythin runs on spin...how do u not open ure mouth before u know what ure talkin about?

i call that word vomit, most ppl call that talking....with no end in sight. i try to keep it simple...u dont talk if u dont have anything to say. But for every 10 people i meet, its like the definition of talking is always to say something stupid...and then say something else to cover up ure earlier stupidity...and then its a slippery slope....u only stop when a stray dog passes u by and everyones interested in the dog instead of whatever it is u were talking about....but here's the catch....if u were even the tiniest bit smart...u would just shut the f$k up....

But no.

As soon as the dog passes by, u start again...like u had to hit ure numbers that minute....phew...i just made my word numbers ....damn im good....

and everyone then whispers...u know he made his numbers....

which is where the entire expectations comes into play...

so if ure still reading this post, ud realize im just ranting about nothing in particular, but am having a ball in creating these heightened expectations for u....its coming folks...u will get some solid news in this post on where my life is headed next....its almost here....it is...i promise.

the bubble bursters....

have u met ppl who just claim to know it all and then under the pretext of keeping it real burst all ure bubbles? now im a solid bubble guy...i wander off in all random directions in my own bubble...not bothering anyone else mind u....but then these bubble bursters have to pin me down and burst it...like they have some sort of fetish in chasing away dreams....

why dont they sell their stock right next to the dream catchers in stores...if u like someone get them a dream catcher....( ya the round thing with feathers)...if u really like them (..wink..wink ) get them a dream chaser....

in the end i think both work the same way....fool u into believing somethings gonna happen when what happened just happened and u were too stupid to realize it just did.

process ppl...

i hate these ppl. i seriously hate these ppl.

the ones who always start a meeting showing a f@#$king presentation on how things should be done....the methodology man...process pete....but dont know what the hell they r doing.

i have one thought on all this. by the time ppl go through the meeting learning the process...most of them have already forgotten what they do for a living...and the only thing they remember is...yes... the process.

its like when the end comes ( which always does)....we're all running around like headless chicken...yelling....wheres the process?...the process!!...THE PROCESS!...

how do u think american companies have become this fat and stupid?...because u only have all these fancy mba kids running the show with words like processes and methodologies and powerpoints....none of them have a clue what they're talking about....

so much for the process.

the end

ok had to get all this off my chest....and now im a free man.....yeey....

but my biggest crib of these 5 months is yet to fill the void....

WHY THE F@#$K IS HILLARY STILL RUNNING? IS SHE CRAZY??

ok now i feel much better.

seeya all.

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